Never More
by IdEnTatyCRYsis09
Summary: Knives is confronted by the world and himself. An inside look of the unjustified. Warning: Rated M for later chapters of yaoi. please review.
1. Chapter 1

**Never More**

Death cradled him for nearly a month. His survival seemed bleak but still he continued to exist. Patience and silence were his only guide, leading him blindly through layers of vivid dreams painted on an endless canvas for which nothing could truly decribe. Colors full of life's warmth abandoned and abused scattered across his mind, flying and falling into a burning rage of fear, a graspless world.

"Why don't you wake up?" Meryl starred indifferently not really expecting any answer. "You've been asleep for four weeks now." As if he comprehended what she was saying but chose to ignore her, she went on,"You are very self centered, don't you know Vash is worried about you?" The clock's timeless ranting broke in, tick tock, tick tock, tick tock. "Wake up!" The coals in her voice heated and the need to strike him had almost overpowered her judgement, she caught herself and briskly chortled at the silliness of it. The small woman leaned closer to size this uncontious fellow up. "If you do one more thing to hurt Vash, I swear I'll-- I'll-- well I don't know what I'll do but I can promise you it will be rash!" She finished her threat with a hmph and a victorious grin. His face contorted for the first time in several weeks causing meryl to resemble that of a dear in the headlights. He didn't stir much more than that but the crumpled scowl still lingered on his features. After assurring herself he hadn't awoken, she rebuilt her confidence with a fleeting manner but said nothing more to the ambiguous being. Tenaciously She stood and watched, his expression was that of annoyance but not with her, rather he seemed to be annoyed with himself. Only one question remained in her thoughts,_ What is he dreaming about?_

The kitchen danced dimley on command of the table candle. Three bodies occupied the chairs of the table and sat in dead air. Occationally a fork or knife would tink and wine against porcelain plates followed by an awkward chewing also accompanied by the relentless crickets. Milly solemly smiled while vash refused to make eye contact. "What are you going to do with him?" Meryl wiped out the intoxicating hush. The false smile vanished from Milly's face and she filled her mouth with another bite of beef. Milly wanted nothing to do with that man, the tyrant who murdered her love. Vash steadily nawing the steak between his teeth trying to stall for a good answer, he woul've been grateful for even an okay answer.

He swallowed, "I'm not sure yet."

"Well _get _sure."

"What do you want me to do with him?"

"He's your brother! All I know is he's not staying here."

"What? Where am I suppose to put him?"

"He can stay until he's better, after that Milly and I don't ever want to see him again."

Vash cut himself off another piece of meat and tried his best to enjoy it. At that moment Meryl knew that Vash had mentally hung up on her.


	2. Chapter 2

Just Me: Holy Moly! How could I have forgotten to introduce a setting? You can tell this is my first fic, right? We are experiencing minor difficulties. ((makes static sounds with mouth.))

Setting: This takes place after the last episode in the series. Knives is still recovering after his encounter with Vash. Vash is living with the girls and everything is pretty peaceful for the moment. **Problem solved and I apologize for any confusion anyone might have had.**

The next morning the sun groped lazily about the house, touching everything it could with a gentle curiosity. The crickets had gone to bed and the town was now bustling with life.

Rays of light crept deviously through the curtains of Meryl's window. Kuroneko, who was once gratified by the scenery outside, pounced from the window sill onto an unsuspecting spider progressing across the wooden floor, which caused the curtains to lurch open and the greeting sun landed directly on Meryl's face. "Five more minutes." she incoherently mumbled at the offender and rolled over.

_A recess later, Merly's eyes fluttered open and she was awake, ready to take on the world. She yawned blissfully, contentedly moved out of bed, and planted her feet into a pair of fuzzy brown slippers. She bumbled down the hall scuffing the slippers along the flooring as she went, following her basic need to survive the morning; coffee was calling. Almost to the kitchen the corner of her eye caught three figures relaxed on the couch. Milly and Vash were on either side of what appeared to be a still sleeping Knives, they sat slumped facing her. "Good morning." She slurred joyfully at them. None answerd back but unceasingly they kept their eyes on her. "What is it, guys?" She smiled as if there was a joke she didn't get. "What's going on?" There was an uncomfortable pause before she edged torward them. "Why are you looking at me?" It wasn't until she got closer that she realized that they weren't observing her but starring off into nothingness. "Hello?" Meryl waved her hand hopelessly infront of Milly but got no reaction, she pushed Vash's shoulder and he sundered from the others on the arm of the couch. From the motion, Vash's lips freely persed and blood spewed from them. The frightened woman jumped back as if on a spring and looked to Milly for some sort of explanation, crimson now poured from her best friend's nose and ears. "Oh my God!" came as more of a desperate whisper than anything. They wern't relaxing; they were being supported by the sofa. Meryl's insides were collapsing at the thought that was so evident now. They were dead._

"_Good morning." The reply her first statement wanted was answered by the now grinning Knives. Terrified, she forced herself to look at him. He met her gaze with empty eye sockets and her stomache hurled. "Don't worry," he smiled heartedly, "you'll see them again soon." Fear paralyzed the small woman as Knives's hand reached for her._

Meryl jolted out of her bed and sailed out of the covers off the end onto the impenetrable floor. Still shell shocked she searched frantically for the assailant while still on the ground. (Just Me: I bet you said shearched. .) Kuroneko gave her a skeptical glance then nonchalantly walked away. Seeing as the seat belt lights were no longer on (Just me: Metaphor here.) and the danger was over she chuckled, the worst chuckle she ever chuckled, at her own absurdity. The front door slammed and Meryl internaly screamed blowing up any functional organs. Immediately she flew down the hall and ripped the door to Knives's room open with such force she may have as well surged right through it. There he lay, peaceful and deathlike. She eyed him suspiciously and inched closer. Extending a ginger hand out to expose this faker she poked his cheek, no response. She poked harder making his head shift a little, no acknowledgment. Determined, she situated her fingers and thumb on either side of his mouth and applied a little pressure, which in turn only made his lips a little pouty but still no counteraction. She shook his face.

"What are you doing, Sempai?"

Meryl jumped out of her skin. Milly stood in the doorway to the room with an armful of geroceries. "He's awake." Meryl advised emphatically. Milly simply peered around Meryl at the plant who apparently was still hibernating. She conveyed a look to Meryl that just said 'you poor confused little thing'. "He _is_ awake, I _know_ he is. I--." The comprehension of her accusation took effect and they stood in silence.

To quickly change the mood Milly optimisticly said, "I bought breakfast for us, it's your favorite, green eggs and ham." Milly gestured with the bag to signify the location of the produce. "Well, they're not really green but I bought some food dye so we can make them green." She smiled that sarrow filled smile again. There was another breathing spell then Milly added, "I was wondering if you could help me make it."

Angry with herself for _just_ now becoming aware of Milly's discomfort near this room she smiled and quickly answered, "Of course." As Meryl was shutting Knives's door behind her she asked conspicuously, "Where's Vash?"

"I don't know, he's been gone since I got up." Milly cheerily answered.

"Vash got up before me? That's amaz--"

The front door gave an encore and Vash stumbled in. He looked as if he had slept in a gutter all night. He wandered up to them, beamed and said, "Oh, hello girls, what are you doing up this late?" He wobbled a little and the two just gawked at him. "I'm sorry, I just need to--" He stammered and fumbled to the couch. "-- sit down." Within seconds he was conked.

"--ing. And he's drunk, I should've known." Her light attitude lasted shortly before the irritation set in. "You dumb fucking idiot!" She grabed him by the collar of his tradditional red coat and violently rattled him. "You left us here alone all night with that phyco in the other room!" Vash muttered something that sounded like 'five more minutes'. "Damn you!" Meryl screeched. Milly tenderly pried her off the outlaw before she killed him.

"How 'bout that breakfast?" The tall women reminded Meryl pleasantly.

The insurance girls sat at the table with some rather pathetic looking green eggs and ham. Meryl proded spots of the eggs that escaped the dye while Milly nudged the ham around. They chatted about nothing really important and occasionally listened to Vash snoring away on the sofa. The house seemed so quiet and solemn now that Vash's brother was present in the picture and Vash perpetually drank. Milly just started picking up the guitar and smoking which everyone figured was her way of manipulating the obligatory depression that came with the priest's sudden death. Meryl continued her strict diet of stress and so the world kept on spinning. "Do you think he's in heaven?" Milly asked out of the blue.

Meryl stupidly replied, "Who?"

"Nicolas." Milly imperceptibley frowned but answered.

"I'm certain of it." Meryl tried her best to seem convincing. "I mean, he _is_ a priest and don't all priests go to heaven? Well, except for Catholic priests." She laughed at her own joke but the moment was lost when Milly didn't respond like she had hoped. "I'm sorry." Milly stared at her plate for a bit before calmy setting the fork and knife down on the table suface.

"Excuse me." She said politely and left Meryl at the table alone.

After hearing the big girl's door close Meryl threw her knife and fork, while the knife stuck faultlessly in the wall the fork blunderingly hit the floor. "Damnit." She cursed her boorish tongue. _This is all his fault!_ She slanted in her chair to look down the hall. _If he hadn't have killed Wolfwood, if he would've just died in that godforsaken desert... _She stood._ Everyone would be happy. _She eagerly marched torward Knives's room. _That bastard!_ She had no idea what she was going to do when she barged in but the moment she entered she noticed a pair of piercing blue eyes glaring straight at her.

Just Me: Well that's it for the second chapter. Hope you enjoyed it. If not feel free to set me on fire. Until next time. Ciao.


	3. Chapter 3

Just Me: Okay, next chapter... ((rolls up sleeves)) ...here we go.

The atmosphere in the room had become so intense that Meryl felt her skin being torn from her. _Shit, shit, shit! What was I thinking coming in here! Shit! _The blonde man stared with malicious hunger into Meryl's eyes looking for a tasty soul to devour. Afraid he would strike at any sudden movement, she held like a rock but noted her situation similar to that of a palm tree in a hurricane.

Milly sat in the solitude of her faint room. The butt of her cigarette was crushed between her fingers as if she was hanging on for dear life. Milly would inhale frequently, wishing that the connection of Nicholas' bad habbit and her would by some means bring him back, then exhale like she was expelling a demon. The walls reflected waves of concern and remorse to her. She smiled at them as she mourned, and let their comfort rock her with an empty lullaby into a detached numbness. At the twin time of Meryl's startling scream, Milly's forgotten cigarette burned her fingers with it's dying breath. She cast the burning culprit to the floor and faster-than-lightening chased the distressed call.

"Shut up!" Knives jeered. "You're too fucking loud."

Meryl wailed as Knived got closer to silence her. Rage built within him at the abuse his ears we're taking, and the fact that moving hurt quite considerably from his wounds and sore muscles. It was enough to want to take her head off. The closer he got, the further she involuntarily backed away until she was hostage to the corner of the room. The small, fine blades of the brother's right arm stretched gradually torward their prisoner. (Just Me: For those of you who have only seen the anime, he has blades in the manga.) Knives didn't even sense the presence abaft him with the distraction in front of him. A firm hand seized the deadly extension, while another captured his shoulder and with delicate precision, the limb was wrenched upward behind him. Following the action came a crude, sickening 'pop'. Knives' voice blared with agony and the blades consequently disapeared beneath his skin, but Milly kept the dislocated arm fixed in her grip. The disoriented plant fell to his knees. Milly felt a sort of release in this violent passion but couldn't bare the sinful temptation any longer; she let go and his arm fell limply at his side. Meryl's legs gave out and she slid down the wall gladly welcoming the floor. She came face to face with Knives. Sweat dripped down his temples as he vigorously embraced the source of his pain with his hand and the room was filled with nothing but labored breathing.

Vash lay upsidedown on the couch with a goofy grin happily dozing through the whole commotion.

Milly and Merly held down one side of the room while Knives held the other. They glared fieriously across at eachother, like it was a sort of staring contest. Too weak to attack, Knives had tried to escape twice already and was thwarted both times. _While we're sitting here, he's buying time to recover. I've got to do something before he does, I've got to get Vash, but I won't-- I **can't** leave Milly here alone with him! _Meryl fought an exhausting war with herself before she whispered, "Milly, I'll stay here, you go get Vash."

Milly dispensed her a gutsy grin, "No, no offense, Sempai, but you're a pushover without deringers." She gave the thumbs up, "You go, I've got it covered." Meryl's expression faded from anger to concern to somber acceptance.

"Be careful."

Intently listening to their conversation, Knives' hopes lifted when Vash's name emerged but were quickly mangled when the sentence came together and concluded that Vash was associated with these damn vermin. Knives recognized this to be his last chance of freedom and he planned to take it. With his now handicaped arm he weighed his options, escaping by force seemed doubtful at this point, and trying to reason with this barrier of a woman was definitely out of the question. Maybe he could trick her or use telekinesis to lock her in place. With the amount of energy he had left he might be able to hold her, if that, for two minutes, He almost carried through with it until reality hit him like a brick wall; he hadn't even taken account into his bullet wounds but knew none the less, even if he managed to get outside he had no clue where he was and most assurringly wouldn't get too far.

The amazon-woman was fixated on the suspicious man across the room. It was obvious that he was absent in thought, but contributed the same fixated look back to her. Milly noticed him glance, every now and then, to the window or door. _He must be scheming to flee,_ she thought. But at the climax of the tension the fire in his eyes snuffed and he settled against the Milly imitated. She casually brought a hand up to scratch a defiant ich on her nose and for the first time spyed a beastly gash in her palm.

"Get up, Vash!" yelled the frantic Meryl point-blank in Vash's ear. He opened one eye, recognized the intruder, and closed it again. "Get up you Idiot!"

"Why?" He grumbled.

"Knives is awake, that's why!"

"So put him to bed" Vash slurred half asleep. Meryl punched him. "I'm awake, don't hit me, I'm awake!" Vash displayed a terrified, drowsy look. "Okay, what happened?"

Milly was dismissed from her guard duties when the room was invaded by the anxious Vash and Meryl. She quickly departed to the bathroom to nurse her injury, and Meryl followed.

"My dear Vash, I'm _so_ glad to see you." Knives spat sarcastically, he was the first to speak.

"...How are you feeling?" Vash interupted a little hurt by Knives' contemptious tone.

"Other than my fucking arm being broken I'm just_ perfect._"

The Stampede didn't acknowledge the dislocated appendage until now and tried with the utmost senserity to tend his brother's wound. He was met with Knives' unyielding resistance. A clenched fist swung warningly in Vash's vicinity. Vash didn't fear the physical damage, but feared his brother's anger which might arouse his powers and having a hangover didn't help either.

"Fuck off, you goddamn ass! How dare you shoot me then involve me with your maggots." He guffed

"I didn't know what else to do and--"

"I'd rather be dead." Retorted Knives crossing his arms over his conceited chest.

Vash's eyebrows knotted as he thought shamefuly, _That can be arranged. _He gripped the emotion and tried to mentally chuck it but it caught his finger just in time. "You'll stay here until you've completely recovered, you'll abide by _our_ rules, and you _won't_ complain." Vash's words cut the air like a hot knife through butter. The statement left the blue-eyed-twin dumbfounded. "Here,..." The Typhoone attempted to aid Knives, "...let me help you to bed."

"I don't need you." He spat and miserabley tried standing, after accomplishing that, getting to the bed proved a much more complicated task. He resentfully let Vash help him the rest of the way.

"Are you hungry?" Vash waited but Knives didn't reply. "I'll bring you some food later, then." He abruptly turned and sauntered out so Knives couldn't regard his impatience. He looked his brother up and down a last time before shutting the door. Knives was feingning interest in something outside the window. "I'll check on you and if you're not here; I'll find you."

_And if you're not here I'll find you. _Knives mimicked crudely. _The fool._

Just Me: Yay! It's the end of the third chapter! Grr... That means I'm gonna have to right another. Oh well. ((uses voice-over-guy voice)) Tune in next time, you won't want to miss it. Ciao.

P.s. Reviews are always welcomed. ((cough))Review me!((cough)) Please. 3


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